Do you want to be more attractive?

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 It’s in something different than you might think.

Would you like to be more attractive? When you’re at a party or meeting that people will come to meet you? And not only that, but that they like you and are fascinated by you? Or that you are stand out at work?

Attraction is more than your looks. Of course, how you look is important. A well-groomed appearance is nice, but it is certainly not the only thing. You can look so beautiful and dressed up, but still might not be seen as attractive. And what is an attractive appearance for one person may not be the case at all for another. You can say it is a matter of taste.

In addition to taking care of yourself and having a healthy lifestyle,  to be found attractive is also a huge positive boost of mental energy. Simply put, you just feel really good about it.

Appear confident, and therefore being attractive to others, is more than just looks. Being friendly is just as important. That sounds logical right? A while ago I was at a party and walked up to someone to have a chat with. After I had introduced myself and ha a brief chat, I got a very unpleasant feeling. That woman was just really blunt with me. That was such a downer! Agree? Is such a person still attractive? No way!

On another occasion, at a lunch meeting, I got into a conversation with a woman who was well into her eighties but still fully involved in society and who was so vibrant that just listening to her gave me a lot of energy. She was also genuinely interested in everyone and everything around her and had an exciting and busy social life. This lady had enormous appeal!

It is a simple example. If you do not only come across as confident, but you are also friendly to others, it works wonders. Being kind to others also makes you feel happy and pleasant.

If you also want to appear more confident, I have some more simple tips for you.

1. If you stand with your back straight, you appear self-confident. In addition, standing with your arms crossed does not help, you then have a closed posture. Don’t stand with both your hands in your pockets either. And when you walk, do so with your back straight, not bent or hunched, but with your head held high. It may feel weird if you start paying attention to your posture, but I assure you, it will feel oh so good if you always do this, because it literally and figuratively grows you.

2. Standing too close to someone is intimidating, so keep enough but not too much distance. Don’t get into someone’s comfort zone. Feel how far that is. I always find it unpleasant when someone stands very close to me.

3. Always be empathic towards others, everyone has their own story in life. You don’t know where that other person comes from. Empathize with the other person, be genuinely interested in what that person has to say and don’t judge.

4. Involve people into your story, invite them to participate in what you have to say. Ask their opinion, what they think about something, maybe even challenge them a little bit.

5. Be in the present, by which I mean that your thoughts are in the now, in the conversation.

6. Look people in the eye, not all the time, of course, because then it looks more like staring, and someone quickly feels uncomfortable, but pay attention. When I am talking to someone who is constantly looking at something else, I get the idea that my conversation partner is busy with completely different things and then I also drop out earlier.

7. Be positive and stop complaining. Nothing is more repulsive than someone who constantly complains. How tiring it is when someone you’re talking to is just complaining. That’s one good reason to get out of the way very quickly.

8. Actively listen to others, be interested in what they have to say. It could be surprising what someone has to say if you listen carefully.

9. Be yourself in every situation, don’t pretend to be a different person, be authentic. There is only one person on this earth who is as unique as you, so cherish that.

10. And very important: have fun, laugh and smile, because nothing is more attractive than someone who smiles. Someone with a smile on their face acts like a magnet.

Okay, some people seem to have natural appeal, or have thought and worked on this. They have worked to increase their confidence and believe in what they do and what they stand for. I hope these tips are enough for you to increase your attractiveness. It can sometimes be a barrier to show yourself more, because that’s what you do with this too. It may feel uncomfortable at first, but trust me, just do it, practice a lot and you will find that it is getting easier and more happy with yourself.

And if you are one of those people who has it all naturally, take a look around your area for someone who needs these tips. Approach someone who could use a boost and start a conversation. Then be genuinely interested in what he or she has to say. This way you can also increase their self-confidence and attraction with someone else.